Entry # 59: July 10, 2006

Camp Buehring, Kuwait (Somewhere near the Iraq border)

In my last brief, I did a Smoky and the Bandit impersonation peeling off into the desert after escaping the Squid from the Sand Dunes. Inspired by my own audacity, I decided to dig out Smoky and the Bandit from my extensive DVD collection, watch it again, and drink Coca-Cola Classic and eat peanuts.

Wait a minute. I’ve seen this movie almost ten times and I’ve never caught this before. When the Bandit goes to talk Cledus into joining him on his bootleggin’ run, Cledus mentions my hometown of Conyers in his excuse for not wanting to join the Bandit. That made my day. My hometown is immortalized in one of the greatest films ever made in the South. Ol’ Jerry Reed (Cledus, aka the Snowman) even pronounced it right, saying Cahn-yerrs. Also, I noticed a remarkable similarity between Sheriff Buford T. Justice and the Swabbie. I don’t plan on bootleggin’, but just as soon as I get back to Georgia, this Bandit will ride again, albeit within the speed limit (wink).

Now if you’ve never seen the movie, the whole premise of the movie is based on the fact that you used to not be able to transport Coors east of the Mississippi River and the Bandit has 28 hours to get 400 cases of Coors from Texarkana to Atlanta. I’ve had Coors, and I still think it should still be illegal for it to be transported east of the Mississippi River. The Bandit should’ve grabbed 400 cases of Shiner Bock instead. That’s a fine tasty treat of fermented hops.

Shiner Bock is good beer for summer drinkin’, a perfect warm weather beer. Ask me right now if I want to come over for a Shiner Bock and I’ll reply, “That’s a big 10-4, ol’ buddy, let me flip flop in that direction and I’ll be at your 20 in no time. And I won’t back off the hammer even if I’ve got a dozen bear rollin’ discos on my tail.” You better believe it. And so the Soldier’s life continues…